But what if it was all a dream

This is more unsettling. I know it's there. I know it should be there. I know this pristine landscape is hiding its horrors like teeth.

[I.D. an edited version of the "children's hospital" meme photo where the splattering red pattern on the hall floor has been removed. End I.D.]

Well duh. It’s just color theory

Ben and Jerry’s is dangerous ice cream... capitalizes on the evolutionary human instinct to dig for chunks... before you know it half the pint gone

the children yearn for the mines

by the way i'm the reason why they send weathermen into hurricanes and shit. "it's needless and dangerous!!!!!" i don't care. every day i call into CNN and demand they send their most pathetic newscaster into a storm to watch them be knocked down by wave and wind and they sigh and say yes ma'am. and i do this all for nasty, sexual purposes, if you were wondering.

my favorite part of this post is people started tagging it with names of characters i've never heard of so i got curious and googled them and like a third are just tagging it as their local weatherman. very funny.

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

t-shirt that says "object permanence is for schmucks!" on the front

t-shirt that says "object permanence is for schmucks!" on the back

are they the same shirt

idk

weirdest side effect of the pandemic is how many people i know who get sick and say 'but my covid tests are negative so i should be fine' like you know other illnesses. exist. right.

reblog to enlist your mutuals in building the House :)

oh idk I guess ill go scurry up and down the walls a bit and maybe fly into the lights a couple times

what are you doing with that cup and piece of paper

Holding the laptop’s power button down because it’s crashed and there’s no other way to turn it off feels so unsettling. It makes me feel like I’m holding a cushion over its face while the life slowly ebbs out of it.

Weird how “masturbating and falling asleep in the late afternoon” isn’t regarded as a cherished summertime tradition

Whoever lives like this….. we live in such different worlds that i don’t even want to know you

also literally fucked a man so hard yesterday that today i found pieces of my bed on the floor

I read this too fast and thought it said “pieces of him on the floor”